Finally its 5!

  
   Time was ticking off the clock in Konoha. The Festival was well into its third day. The contestants haven’t made a move yet on either side.

  At the moment, the score on the Boy’s side remained 2, while the opposing team had a score of 1.

  Tsunade-sama was very irritated on the other hand, “This is the lamest festival so far yet! What’s taking so long!? Shizune!”

The apprentice jumped at her name, “I-I don’t know! Perhaps, both teams are coming up with strategies. You should be patient, Tsunade-sama.”

The said Hokage waved her hand before her in an impatient manner, “Yeah, I know. I thought by choosing Sakura on the Girls team, and Shikamaru on the boy’s team, there would be lots of action!”

  Seeing that the Hokage was very agitated, Shizune spoke her mind; an idea that she had for a while, “Why don’t you come up with your own matches?”

“Like what?”

“Have them gather around and compete for points! Just this day…perhaps?” she flinched, scared at her masters reaction. Tsunade, on the other hand, thought this over.

  “It’s not a bad idea, Shizune.” She said in a loud voice. “Send the message out within an hour. Have everyone gather in a large area by 5. Go!”

“Yes, ma’am.”
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     Ino tapped her foot, glancing impatiently at the watch in her hand, “What’s taking that girl so long?”

   Ten-Ten entered from the bathroom, “How about this?”

  Ino looked over and bit her lip, “Eh…I don’t know…you still have a feminine look to you. I still think Sakura should do it. With her flat chest and all.”

  Ten-Ten sighed and transformed back into a woman, “But Sakura can only transform with pink hair. It’s too obvious.”

  “I know, I know.”

  The door opened with a slam, revealing an exhausted Sakura. “Here…have them…ready…”

   She handed Ino a patch of pills, all 12 neatly aligned. “Are you sure this has an opposite effect?”

Sakura nodded, “By the way…Shizune…wants us to…gather around…has something…special for us.” She fainted before them.

   “Poor girl. Probably scarred for life.” Ino tsked.

   Hinata, meanwhile, was also lying unconscious on the bed. Once hearing the plan, she had a meltdown and refused to be a part of it.

“Come on, girls. For now, let’s put our plan on hold. Let’s see what the Hokage has in store for us.”
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      “The map is done!” Kiba roared, letting his head fall back onto Akamaru’s belly.

Naruto came around, a banana in his hand, “Wow, good job.”

  “Now we have to assign each man a position-” Sasuke began, but was cut off by a messenger hawk.

  The blonde ninja walked over to the window still and picked the parchment up, “It says we are to be expected by the area between Yoshi’s Sushi Bar and Long Fei Diner.” The boy’s exchanged confused glances.
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    Many villagers watched in curiosity as the Hokage waited for the contestants to arrive.

  The doors to the Sushi Bar and the Diner were open, although everyone was forced to leave the place.

  The Girl’s team arrived, and immediately many women dressed identically led them towards the Sushi Bar entrance.

   “What the…” Ino muttered, as each girl handed them aprons. Tsunade who stood in the middle of the large circle, created by villagers, watched on in approval. Minutes later, the men arrived and were handed the same attire, but placed by the Diner’s entrance.

  “We are gathered here today,” Tsuande boomed out into the large crowd, “To witness an exciting match! As we all know, the Boys vs. Girls Festival is currently in play. But just for an old lady’s amusement, I have decided to create my own match!”

   “Aww, how cute.” Kiba couldn’t help but say. Naruto bit back a snort.

  “It’s a cooking competition!” the entire crowd repeated the words in confusion and excitement. “The two teams must create any dish for each player on the opposing team to eat! The team must finish every last bite! It’s as simple as that! No rules other than everything that goes into the dish must be EDIBLE! Got that, boys?”

  “Hey!” the boys groaned, “What about them?!”

  “So have your fun and in two hours you will be called back out. Got that, girls?”

Sakura and Ino rolled their eyes, remembering the many times they were late to Tsunade’s meetings, only because they didn’t look ‘nice enough’, or any other womanly excuse.  

  “Make it creative…Begin!”
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    “How about we just get a bowl and throw some junk in there?” Kiba suggested, watching Naruto walk back and forth.

   “I’ve tried that plenty of times, and trust me, it comes out good.” Kiba rolled his eyes.

  “Not if you throw grass in there…or a cup of vinegar.”

   Naruto raised his arms, “Hello! That’s what I did!”

  “Gross!”

Shikamaru snickered, “At least we know Naruto would try anything they make.”

“What plans do you have, Shikamaru?”

Shikamaru sat back and eyed a pan hanging from the ceiling curiously. “A woman’s weaknesses are large portions…and fat.”
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   “A man’s weaknesses are vegetables…and neatness.”

   Hinata warmed up the oven, while Ten-Ten took out some pans. Sakura rummaged through the cabinets and got out some knives and pans. Ino searched for knives. “Exactly what should we make, though?”

   Sakura found some frozen meat, and immediately threw it on the stove, just in case. “I think we should create small portions and see what bigger thing we can come up with. I’ll pair up with Ino, while you two create some of your own things.”

  She paused for a second, feeling the light weight of the pills in her pocket, “I think I want to put a pill in there…”

  The room froze. Each were thinking the same thing. Not a bad idea…

Ino shook the thoughts away, “Let’s save it for a separate point. Come on, Sakura, just cut those tomatoes.”

But Sakura was thinking otherwise, “No…I want to put one in Naruto’s. We have 12…”

  Her best friend glanced sideways at her, “Why…would you want to do it only for…Naruto?”

  Sakura gave her a knowing look. “Revenge.”

  Ino’s expression remained blank. Going back to her lettuce she said, “Do what ever you want. It’s your friendship.”

  The pink head almost cut her finger. Trust me, Ino, that friendship is history.
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       “I’m done doing whatever I was doing!” Kiba called back. He grimaced at the stickiness of his hands.

    “Uhh…” Shikamaru hesitated at the sight of Kiba’s…mess, “That’s good, now do it three more times.”

    “Aww man, I hate cooking!”

   “This isn’t cooking, dude.” He placed a hand on Kiba’s shoulder, “This is kneading dough.”

   “But dough always comes out good.” The other whined. From his left, Sasuke walked over and dropped a cup of oil on the round slap of dough. Naruto followed along, sprinkling pepper as well.

   Kiba sighed, and then looked over at the others, smirking. “Three more?”

    As Kiba continued on that end, Naruto rummaged through the refrigerator. He came across an interesting item, “Hey guy, what’s this…it’s so red!”

     Shikamaru rolled his eyes, “That’s tomato paste, idiot.”

    Silent for a moment, Naruto grabbed it out of the fridge and strolled over to his cooking area, “Let’s use it.”

    Sasuke threw two cups of oil on the paste, as well, once Naruto had successfully placed the content in a bowl. “Throw some of this in there!”

   A salt and pepper shaker flew across the room. Naruto caught it one handed and spilled the content on the paste. Studying the mess he so far made, he shook his head. “Needs more…stuff.”

   “This!” Sasuke suddenly dropped loads of vinegar in the mix. Naruto grimaced, holding his nose.

“God, I hate that stuff!”

  “That’s why we put it in there.”
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      Chop Chop Chop Chop

“How’s the meat, Ino?” Ten-Ten asked.

   “Gross. Look at all that oil.” Sakura peered over, and held back an urge to vomit. “But remember, its not meat, because it’s veggie.”

   “A veggie patty.” Ino smelled the aroma and sighed, “Gross, yet, a bit appealing at the same time.”

    “But it won’t be the same for the boys.” Hinata added. Sakura eyes wandered over to her station.

  “What are you doing?” she said, an ounce of fear in her voice.

   Hinata looked up and shrugged, “Squishing tomatoes.” The end of the spatula she was gripping was furiously attacking the poor tomatoes. Its juices spilled over the counter.

   “Um…I don’t think that’s nece-”

   “Leave her alone, Sakura. The more weird things we do, the better. I mean, look at this!” the four brown patties sizzled on the stove, “How gross is that?”

   “Pretty gross,” Sakura laughed. She was done cutting lettuce (which she had never washed). “So what kind of bread are we using?”

   “Sourdough.” Ten-Ten answered, smug. She wiped her forehead from the steam the stove was creating, “All men hate sourdough.”
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       The four boys gazed down at the progress they had so far made: four rounds of oily, stinky, raw pieces of dough, topped with the sauce Naruto created. It needed some baking, but at the moment, the boys felt it needed some more stuff.

   “Pickles?”

   “Sakura loves pickles.” Naruto deadpanned.

   “You would know.”

  “Oi, Naruto! Get off, Sasuke. We need to plan this through.” Kiba thought hard, wondering what they should place on the top. “Something fattening…meat!”

   “Already on it!” Naruto opened a large drawer, coming up with many frozen meat items. “Fish?”

   “Fish is too healthy!” Someone called.

    Naruto moved the meat around, “I found pork! All kinds of it!”

   The other three smiled, “Perfect.”
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         All the vegetables were lined up neatly on the counter, ready to be stacked upon.

“How much time do we have left?” Sakura asked, grabbing the sourdough bread.

   “Little less than an hour.”

   “Here are my squished tomatoes. We can use it as sauce.” Hinata offered. The substance was red and thick, like blood. Sakura shuddered. Just thinking about drinking that made her gag.
    
   “Good job, Hinata.”
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    “Okay, thirty minutes in the oven. Check time.”

     Kiba and Sasuke peered into the oven watching as the cheese they had newly placed on top sizzled. The cheese was Sasuke’s idea.

   “That’s disgusting.” Kiba chuckled.

   “Feel sorry for the girls.”

   “They’ll probably take three bites and vomit. I know I would.”
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      Bringing a plate over with the four patties, Ino commented, “We did well, girls.”

   “Now, to bring it all together. Lettuce, check. Tomatoes check. Tomato sauce, check. Sourdough bread, check. Veggie patties check. Onions, pickles-”

   “I have something else!” Ten-Ten interrupted. She came towards the girls with a jar of something white.

   “What is that?”

  “Milk, but shaken. Like milk shake…err, I call it…Mayo.” The brunette watched closely at the others expressions. Suddenly the room busted out laughing.

   “Bring it here!”
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   “What shall we call it boys?”

   It wasn’t that hard of a choice. Sasuke must have placed over a gallon of oil on each dish.

   “Pee.”

   They considered it. Naruto had his fingers on his chin, thinking for a change. “How about…Pee-za!”

  “Za?” Shikamaru questioned. “Why the za?”

   “To make it more interesting. Pee-za!”

   They were silent, taking it in.

  “I like it.” Kiba agreed with a grin. He stretched and dropped his arms on Shikamaru and Sasuke’s shoulders, “Pee-za it is.”
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   “Cuteness.”

     Sakura and Ino groaned, “No. No.”

    The Hyuuga frowned, and whispered, “If we name it something girly it’ll be less appetizing for the boys.”

    “It just makes us look stupid. How about we go the opposite of your thinking and call it ‘Booger.” Ten-Ten smiled wickedly.

    Sakura raised her hands in defeat, “Fine! Booger! I really don’t care anymore.”

   “Veggie Booger.” Ino added in, placing the last of the bread on top of the lettuce.
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       “YOUR TIME IS UP!” Tsunade roared, making the crowds cover their ears, “COME ON OUT!”

    The boys and the girls heard the announcement and grabbed their plates. On the girls end Sakura lagged behind.

   She placed her Veggie Booger on the counter and quickly rummaged through her pocket. The pack of pills came out. Smiling mischievously, she slipped one in, right between the lettuce and tomatoes.

  “Sakura!” Ino called, “Hurry!”

   The girl grabbed her Booger and ran out into the sunlight.

   The four boys stood directly opposite of the girls, each holding what seemed to be a white and red Frisbee on a plate. Naruto was standing on the left, looking smug, and Sakura took her place in front of him.

   “Pee-za.” Kiba said, sounding out each syllable. “A thick crust of dough, smothered in oil, topped with red tomato sauce, smothered in oil, and cheese, smothered in oil, and lastly, all the pork we could find in the kitchen, might I add, smothered in oil.”

    Ino was the first to react, “Oil? B-but-” she looked to Tsunade for help, but the old lady gave her a ‘you have a problem?’ look. The blonde recoiled back, and whispered to herself, “I’m on a two year diet…”

   Ten-Ten was next, “Veggie Booger.” The boys laughed hesitantly, “Two toasty, a bit burnt, sourdough breads. In between them, we have mayo, which is basically milk shaken for two hours, lettuce, not washed, tomato, oh, of course, Hinata’s specialty, squished tomatoes, that freakishly resembles blood, and the main item: a veggie patty. Vegetables so squished together, they form this crispy black round shaped object… fried…in non-fat oil.”

    The Hokage seemed disgruntled. She may never look at Ten-Ten the same way… (Was there even such thing as non-fat oil???)

“Well, then. Each player must finish their dish, to get a point- one point for each player, four max. You have all day to eat it. Contestants, step up.”

   Everyone but Ino and Kiba stepped up. Sakura looked back, “Ino!” she hissed, “Don’t tell me…”

   Her best friend was shaking her head, “I can’t, I’m sorry! Too fattening. I’d rather starve my entire life then eat that shit. BYE!” she disappeared in a flash, leaving Sakura aghast.

    “What’s your problem, idiot?” Sasuke hissed at Kiba.

    “I fucking hate vegetables. They are…a dog’s worst nightmare. Can’t. Sorry. BYE!”
   He was gone before Sasuke can retort back.

   Tsunade barely noticed the disappearance of two contestants. “Uh, two down…six to go! Can they do this?”

   When the entries were switched, Ten-Ten cringed at the sight. Ugh…Cheese.
“Um, Tsunade-sama? I’m lactose intolerant.”

   “What?” Sakura shrieked at this newfound information, “But-but back in the kitchen! You…the milk…mayo!”

   She threw her head back in laughter, “Oh, that’s what I do when I get angry. I shake milk.”

    The entire audience paused and gave her ridiculous looks. She cocked her eyebrow and sighed, “Sheesh people. You guys need to get to know me better.”

    Ten-Ten also disappeared. Meaning, the final contestants were Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Sakura and Hinata.

    Shikamaru sighed, “You know…my mom made me a tuna sandwich before. I’m pretty full. Eating this would be too troublesome.”

   Naruto growled, “Leave this match, Shikamaru, and face my wrath.”  

   “Once I have an empty stomach, see ya!” he slowly walked away an arm waving in dismissal.

   Not once in her life had Tsunade seem something this pathetic. In five minutes half the competition left without taking one bite! Facing the remained, she guessed Hinata would be the next one to leave…because her luck was so bad.

   And she was right.

   “It looks disgusting.” She complained. “Smells bad, too.”

  Sakura resisted the urge to scream at the top of her lungs, but at least Hinata’s was reasonable and something maybe she could talk her out of.

  “Come on, Hinata. Show this village your inner self. Don’t let something like this take advantage over you.”

   “Don’t listen to her, Hinata.” Sasuke interrupted, “Of course it’s disgusting! Your basically eating tomato, bread, cheese and pork in one go.”

    His words seem to affect her more. “He’s right, Sakura! I can’t. I can’t!” She bowed her head, “Sorry, sorry! Forgive me!”

   This time, Sakura was not surprised when she vanished into thin air, as well.

   “Well, what do you know? Team 7 remains.”

   Three pairs of eyes glared at one another, viciously.

   “I’m not afraid of this shit.” Sasuke dropped the plate, while grabbing the Booger. He sank his teeth into the thick crust and took it all in. He chewed and chewed, “This doesn’t taste that bad. Try it, Naruto.”

  The blonde smiled in glee, he opened his mouth, when all of a sudden Sasuke started making choking noises. “Hey, man…you okay?”

  The Uchiha’s fist was pounding on his chest, his mouth filled with the Booger.

   “Sasuke!”

  Sakura rounded up on her former teammate, grabbed him around the stomach and hoisted him up. A round object flew out of the Uchiha’s mouth and into the crowd, who gasped. Sasuke gasped.

    “Did it taste that bad?!” Naruto said outrageously. Before Sasuke could answer, he fainted to the ground. “Well then…”

    Little did they know their teammate only choked for a simple reason: it went in the wrong side of his throat. Nothing more, nothing less.

   Tearing her eyes from Sasuke’s still figure, Sakura glanced at Naruto. As Tsunade’s voice filled the scene, the two exchanged a few words.

   “Who knew it’d come to this?”
  
   Naruto gulped, “It’s always us, isn’t it?”

   A very noticeable anger sparked in her stomach, “Just hurry up and eat the damn Booger.”

  “Then eat your Pee-za.”

  Sakura couldn’t care less about the taste. She just wanted to get away from this bastard and win this match. Although, she remembered what she had done to Naruto’s Booger.

   Instead of taking a bite of her Pee-za, she watched in amazement as Naruto neared the Booger to his mouth. His mouth opened, showing perfect white teeth. His eyes closed. He was so close.

   “You put something in here, didn’t you?”

   “Eh?” She almost doubled over in surprise. The crowd booed around them, wanting some more action. “No-no I didn’t!”

   “Sakura, you were never a good liar.” Her face started to turn red. He sighed, and in a low voice, told her, “Let’s please leave the past out of this Sakura, and play a fair game.”

   She didn’t like his sudden ‘goodness’. Where was that a year ago? “I can’t forget about that, you jerk! Of course you would think that! You are a man, after all!”

   He couldn’t find his words, “Y-y-you’re just being unreasonable! I have apologized too many times to count!”

   “Apologies don’t always fix everything, Naruto!”

The entire crowd watched on, wondering what in God’s name they were arguing about. The Hokage was about to interrupt when Naruto said, “Fine! I don’t care what’s in here. I’ll show you how sorry I am by eating it all!”

   This took her off guard, “Eh?”

  “I’ll eat this. And I won’t regret it. Because I don’t regret anything more than what happened back there, okay?” He had a sudden boldness in his eyes.

    Why was she suddenly feeling a sense of guilt? “Ah, Naruto…” He had the Booger close to his mouth, and within seconds she felt her hand wrap around his wrist. “Not that one…”

   Placing her Pee-za on the ground she ran over to where Shikamaru had placed his Veggie. Running back to Naruto, she handed him the other Booger. “Eat this…please.”

   Why was she doing this?

   Naruto seemed otherwise, “No. I’m going to eat the one you made me!” Sakura pushed him and reached for the contaminated Booger, but he held it far from her. She pushed Shikamaru’s against his chest.

   “Eat this one!” she hissed, not liking his disobedience.

   “No, no, no!”

   What happened next was a blur to her. Her strength got the best of her, and she truly shoved Naruto far enough that she herself slipped. But what she slipped on was not the ground.

    The Pee-za she had placed on the ground flew from her feet and into the air. Naruto watched in horror as Sakura fell to the ground. The Pee-za swiveled in the air, it meat content scattering all over the place, and finally landing squarely on Sakura’s face.

    A moment of silence shook the crowd. A few seconds later, everyone broke out laughing. All except Naruto…who was feeling quite…endangered.

    “Uzumaki…” Sakura’s voice seemed like it came out of a scary movie, “Naruto…”

   His teeth clashed together furiously.

   The pink head rose from her messy spot. Red sauce dripped from her chin and onto her clothing.

   “You. Are. Dead. Meat.”

   He ran faster than anything could take him.

(The contest was well forgotten. Sorry, Tsunade.)